Bon Voyage!

Journal entry 7/15/22

My romantic heart sees beautiful couples, and I think back to when I was “deeply in love,” more like blindly in love. Even though it was not sustainable or ideal, it was beautiful; it was.

Love like that at a time in your life where kisses and letters defined the relationship was beautiful. You love me; I love you. I feel like we are floating in space together; every indie song reminds me of our love, touch, and essence. There is no conflict we can possibly foresee breaking us apart. Holding hands is our secret superpower and forever is the only option.

Was this love young? Naive? Unhealthy? Maybe. But it allowed me to feel. To feel dream and fly also came without a map, so with time, I got lost. I lost you. I searched for the stars as a guide. It seemed like I was getting closer to you, to us, to our magic. After months of travel, I realized I was on an entirely new island—no trace of us, just the memories that live in my heart. First, I hoped you would come looking for me. If I lost you, I figured you must have been worried and looking for me too.

You never did. This hurt me, well, more as it broke me. I blamed you first, then myself, but after winter passed and the flowers came out so did I. The sun shone clarity into my heart. It brought compassion, forgiveness and closure.

I understand now I had to get lost to find myself again. To learn to love again. I know it will look different. I’ll make sure to carry a map or two next time around.

For you, I wish the same. I wish you love, happiness and compassion. I wish you success, realized dreams, and adventures. I wish you anything that fills you with joy and purpose.

We will find our way again—different paths but exciting ones, nevertheless.

I must tell you how grateful I am to have met you. To have lived you, breathed you, and loved you. I always will. Thank you for sharing your stardust and your time on Earth with me. Until next time. Bon voyage!

One thought on “Bon Voyage!

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